The Digital Sunset: A Simple Family Plan to Get Your Evenings Back from Screens
The other night, I looked up from my phone, where my thumb was still mindlessly scrolling through a news feed. There was no noise in the house. Not loud enough. The blue light from his own screen lit up my husband’s face across the living room. Our daughter was on the couch with her headphones on, lost in a tablet. We were all in the same room, but it felt like we were miles apart. That feeling of being “alone, together” really hit me. We weren’t really talking to each other; we were just living in our own digital worlds.
For so many of us, this is the new normal. The evening used to be a time for families to relax and connect, but now it’s the best time to “zombie scroll.” We’re tired from the day, and the quick rush of dopamine from a screen is too hard to resist. But we’re starting to see the cost: fewer conversations, more irritability, and a subtle but real feeling of being cut off from the people who matter most.
We thought we needed to start over. Not a harsh ban on technology, but a simple, soft line. We needed a “Digital Sunset.”
The “Digital Sunset” Fix
Every night, at a set time, everyone in the house turns off their screens and puts them away for the night. That time is 8:00 PM for our family. There is no screen time from 8:00 PM until bedtime. It’s not about punishing; it’s about keeping a part of our day safe for real life. This easy rule makes it easy to switch from the digital world to the real world, giving our brains a break and letting our relationships take center stage.
The Three C’s: How to Do It Without a Rebellion
You need to think ahead when you want to add a new rule. If you drop this bomb without getting ready, it will be a disaster. We did well with the “3 C’s.”
1. Make sure everyone understands: This is not a royal order; it’s a team decision. We talked about it at a family meeting, which we called a “Sunday Sync.” We didn’t say, “You’re on your phones too much.” We asked, “What could we do together if we didn’t have to look at screens for an extra hour every night?” Everyone felt more involved in finding a solution when they thought about the good result. We all agreed to meet at 8:00 PM.
2. Set up a central “charging station.” This is the most important thing to do. “Out of sight, out of mind” is a strong idea. We put a small charging station on a shelf in the kitchen. At 8:00 PM, all of our devices, including mine, my husband’s, and our daughter’s, go to the “charging station” to sleep for the night. Putting them in a different room, away from the bedrooms and living room, is a strong boundary that keeps you from scrolling one last time.
3. Curate Interesting Alternatives: The first few nights, the silence can be… strange. You can’t just take the screens away; you have to give them something better to do. We wrote down some simple, low-effort things we could do instead. This is important: don’t plan a complicated board game every night for two hours. The other options need to be just as easy to use as scrolling.
So, What Do We Really DO?
Your list will be different from everyone else’s, but here are some of our favorites that have stuck:
Play a short game of cards or dice. Uno, Skip-Bo, or Yahtzee are all good choices. They last 15 to 20 minutes and always end with laughter.
Listen to an audiobook or podcast together: Look for a fun mystery or adventure series that the whole family can enjoy.
Do a puzzle: A 1000-piece jigsaw puzzle can stay on a coffee table for weeks, and anyone can come by and fit in a few pieces.
Read: Either in the same room but not together, or take turns reading a chapter book out loud.
Just say: Instead of just asking “how was school?” Try saying, “What was the funniest thing that happened today?”
The goal isn’t to make people have fun; it’s to make it possible for people to connect naturally. Some nights we talk a lot, and other nights we just sit quietly and read our own books. Both are good.
We’ve been doing our Digital Sunset for a few months now, and the changes are small but big. Our daughter is getting more sleep. The frantic search for charging cords every morning is over. The most important thing is that we’re talking more. We’re getting to know the little things about each other’s days again. We’re getting our evenings back, one hour at a time, and remembering what it was like to just be a family.
What is one thing your family loves to do that doesn’t involve screens? Write down your ideas in the comments to help other parents!
